Just a story

I am back. I know it has been a while, but I was thinking about what to write next. So I will get right to it:

It was late in the year 2000. The time was about midnight and for whatever reason there was no way he was getting any sleep. Why was he up? He felt so anxious, so overwhelmed. Suddenly his mind was racing, incoherent thoughts left and right. He quietly got up out of bed and walked through the living room and stepped out onto the patio of the second floor apartment he lived in with his wife of five years. At this point he was sad beyond belief, but why? He was scared stupid, but why? In addition, he was in a dimension of mad that most people could not possibly understand, but why? Normally he is not like this. This is clearly too much bearing down on him. He felt as though there was no one that he could talk to. All coping mechanisms -- Exhausted. Now what?

He was angry -- But at who or what? This was not clear. It was at this part he began to beat himself in the head -- Repeatedly. Over and over and over again he punched himself in the head, thinking that the pain would possibly take his mind off of what was troubling him. It began to hurt. He did not care. He began to cry. Not because of the repeated beatings, but because he was sad and hurting on the inside and it was physically making him ill. This is not like him at all. He felt so far removed from his natural state of being that it was like waking up on another planet only to find that he could comprehend nothing. Clearly, he had no idea of what was going on in his head.

Pained and crying, he crumbled to the floor of the patio in a heap onto his knees. Part of him was hoping that the patio would fall apart and he might tumble to an untimely demise. With his forehead to the floor thinking that maybe he should beat his head on the patio floor until slipping away into unconscious-land, a very odd feeling came over him. A single thought, so innocuous, managed to catch his attention. That thought told him to raise his head. “Pick your noggin up off of the floor!” it said. So he did. When he looked up, what he saw simply amazed him.

He saw his Grandfather. The old man was standing there looking at him, non-verbally telling him to calm down. This was odd considering his Grandfather had passed away the January prior. Yet there he was, with a smile on his face. When his Grandfather was sick and he did not have long for this world, he never got the opportunity to say goodbye to his Abuelo (Grandfather in Spanish). So here it is, a year later and there he was, right there in front of him. It all seemed like he was watching this unfold as if it were a movie. It was very surreal.

“I’m so sorry that I never got to say goodbye!” He tried to speak in regular tones but the words came out somewhat hushed and demure. He said it again and it came out a bit clearer.

He looked into his Abuelo’s eyes and through those eyes he spoke. “You already did.” Now his eyes welled up with tears of understanding. “I was there. I heard you.” His Abuelo smiled at him. Through those eyes and that smile he said those two small statements that seemed to speak volumes to him. Yet nary was a word uttered between them. Though he spoke through his mouth to make the sounds, Abuelo spoke back silently.

Suddenly he noticed that Abuelo was not by himself. There was someone clearly with him. Strangely though the man’s face seemed familiar to him, as if he’d known him his entire life, but at the same time he did not quite know who he was… Kind of.

His features were indescribable. Not for any other reason other than that his features could not be described. The man made him feel at ease. He too smiled at him as if to say that everything will work itself out. “Give it some time.” says the man with Abuelo.

The man put a hand on Abuelo’s shoulder. Abuelo then turned to him with those bright eyes. Those eyes touched his heart and said, “It’s time for me to go now. Don’t worry he knows the way.” Without thinking he asked Abuelo “Is that?” Abuelo smiled a big mischievous smile; turned to the man he was with and said “See! That’s why I love him. He thinks a lot. He was always so smart!” With that the man turns to him, smiled and lowered his head, almost in a tip your hat, bowing type gesture. They both then walked away.

He dried his tears and got up and very calmly went to his room, gently kissed his wife on the cheek, laid down on the bed and amazingly enough went to sleep almost immediately. As he drifted off to sleep, he felt very calm and at ease. All the stresses that he was experiencing did not seem to bother him nearly as much anymore.

Epilogue:

He has only ever told three people about this experience. One of the people that he told was a co-worker with whom he had established a good level of trust in. In addition this person was a Christian who spoke on God but never pushed the issue on anyone.

The co-worker after hearing this story was almost brought to tears. He asked if he would speak to his congregation about this. He respectfully declined the offer. The co-worker then said something to him that gave him great pause. He said to him, “You know what man? You are one of the luckiest people in the world.” He asked, “How so?” The co-worker then spoke these words; “Some people literally spend their entire lives praying constantly for what you experienced without asking! That was handed to you. I will admit I am really jealous of you right now. But that is ok because that means that you are being looked out for.”

After that was said he sat back and reflected on that… Could it be? Was it possible that it was? To this day he still does not know for sure. Though through it all he is happy that it did happen.